Thursday, April 8, 2010

Something-Something

Here it is, the long awaited end to Act One, the final scene. Dum da da Dum. And right on target with 20K. Yee Ha!

Please note this is a first draft and is missing a small piece in the middle which I noted.


Sorry this post has been removed by the author.

23 comments:

Christine Danek said...

Ohhh! I want to read more. Great job on your first draft. Nice work!

Christi Goddard said...

I'll admit, this is not really my preferred genre. I read stuff with monsters and magic. But I will say that you write pretty darned good, chickadee. I'm curious about what happens, and frown when I realize you're not going to post the whole thing, so I'll never know until you get published. :-)

Tara said...

This story is going to be fantastic when it's done!

Small question - wouldn't Tony's first though have been to ask what happened with the baby?

Piedmont Writer said...

Christine -- Thank you.

Christi -- I'll post snippets every Thursday until the book is done, but no, you're right, you'll have to read the whole thing once it's pubbed. I'll send you the ARC so you don't have to wait, how's that?

Tara -- Small Answer -- yes and no. He doesn't want to know, because he thinks he already does, but doesn't want to ask. He does actually ask her but that's not until the night of the 4th of July party. And I haven't written it yet.

Falen said...

well hey, if you're handing out free arcs...;)

I love how you give a rating for each snippet you post.
I'm looking forward to when(if?) you have a rating of R for sex...
Tee hee!

sarahjayne smythe said...

Is it terrible of me to really like Genna's reaction here and to go yay! Because part of me kinda wants to see her find somebody else (who kinda looks like George Clooney or Pierce
Brosnon) for a while. :)

Ok. I'm sorry and I'll go back to my corner and wait some more.

Seriously, you're doing a great job with this and I'm really enjoying reading. :)

~Nicole Ducleroir~ said...

This is coming along GREAT! It's really easy to feel comfortable with your characters, like I've known them a long time. Capturing people like that is a talent that can't be taught.

I had the same question as Tara, though. Remember, you know Tony and his motivations, but the first time reader doesn't. If he doesn't ask what happened, whether she terminated the pregnancy, lost the baby, or if he has a son or daughter running around somewhere, if his reasons will be revealed later in the story, I still think you have to address this point, for the reader. And since this is Genna's POV, doesn't she wonder what his silence is all about? If it were me, and I'd felt wronged all these years, I'd be pretty pissed off if Tony just sat there and cried and didn't even ask if I'd had the baby. You know what I mean?

Anyhoo, that's just food for thought, and you've probably thought about it over and over! You're weaving such a wonderful story full of emotion. I love the plot so far, LOVE the characters (especially Uncle Sally), and can't wait to buy this book!!!

Piedmont Writer said...

Sarah A -- I'm working on something better than an ARC and as soon as I get all the kinks worked out I'll have a surprise for you. And yes, the rating will be R-21 for the sex scene which will be after the 4th of July party -- which I haven't written yet.

Sarah Jayne -- No it's not terrible to like Genna's reaction, I like it too. And as for finding someone else...he's actually going to look like Gerry Beckley (the blond from the old rock group America). And I'm sorry, you are going to have to wait for that.

Nicole -- Dearest you are absolutely right! I've had my beta reader bring this up as well, and unfortunately her suggestion came up after I had written the scene. I know exactly what I want Genna to say, and exactly when to say it. Never fear, he will ask. And you are right, it has to be now. I totally love Uncle Sally, he's just the coolest.

Tara -- Nicole made a great point and I'm changing the scene. Perhaps tomorrow I'll post it.

B. Miller said...

Nice job! Brave of you to post chunks of WIP online... don't know if I could do that!

Thanks for sharing!!

Roland D. Yeomans said...

Like Tara and Nicole, I went, "Ah, Tony, cry later and ask what happened to your baby now." But just coming into this fresh, I thought it had been covered earlier in the conversation.

You have a way of snaring the reader's interest and more importantly, his empathy for the characters. And you've offered up an important life lesson : too often we inflict needless anguish upon ourselves by keeping in our daily thoughts the hurtful people of yesteryear. Flames never go out that are forever fanned.

Thanks, Anne, for your compliments on my short story, THE LIES LOCUST TELL.

May both of us find publication soon. I've run out of places to send my short stories. Sigh. One day, huh? Roland

Lola Sharp said...

Anne, I love this! (though, I agree with Tara, Nicole, and Roland about the asking thing, but I know you are going to fix that up)

Man, I sure do hope she ends up with Tony bu the end, though. I like him. And I am a sap.

Excellent job. Thanks for sharing it with us. (I hope you keep sharing the entire way...or at least until the x-rated scene at the 4th of July party...which I hope she gets with Tony!)

Cynthia Reese said...

Thanks for sharing! I have not the nerves to do something like this. It's all I can do to send stuff to my CPs and my editors. I just sort of pretend that nobody's going to read my book (buy it, yes, absolutely! The Kiddo has a college fund, after all!) once it's out. :-)

Shelley Sly said...

Ooohh! I love it!! I was so with Tony when he said, "Genna, please." And then he watched his life walk away! Oh, I know those feelings. Love this story, and so glad that you're sharing bits and pieces of it. (I'm with the others, can't wait to buy it!) Thanks for posting.

DL Hammons said...

That there's some good stuff! I spotted a couple POV trespasses, nothing major, but the dialogue was spot on and engaging. Excellent work!

Talli Roland said...

Nice job! I'd love to sit down and read all your bits in one go.

Thanks for sharing!

Carolina Valdez Miller said...

Darling, you sucked me in. Your characters feel so strong and genuine, and their story so heartbreaking. I felt like I was listening in on a real conversation. I'm very intrigued, so curious about this story now. But above all, I say Bravo Bravo Bravo. It takes serious guts to put your work out there like that. And I'm so glad you did.

Piedmont Writer said...

B. -- Thanks. Don't know if I'm really brave or just stupid.

Roland -- One day Roland, One day.

Lola -- Gee and I thought you were going to hate me. And I have to ask, why do you like Tony? What particularly draws you to him?

Cynthia -- Perhaps that's my curse, nerves of steel not buns of steel.

Shelley -- I KNEW you would love that line. I wrote it specifically for you you know.

DL -- Yeah, I hate POV right now. I'm having SUCH a HARD time with it.

Piedmont Writer said...

Talli -- Thanks, I'm working on it, you're welcome.

Carolina -- Thank you dearest. High praise coming from you and I do appreciate it.

Palindrome said...

I love the foul language and your rating system. It makes me giggle every time I see it. ;P

Piedmont Writer said...

Thanks Hannah -- Truth be told I swear like a truck driver in real life so I figure my characters should too. And the rating system is for, you know.

scott g.f.bailey said...

Anne: I'm glad you had Tony ask about the baby, because that feels right. I don't know if he'd cry, though. At least, not then, not in front of Genna. It seems fake and manipulative.

Piedmont Writer said...

Scott -- You missed the scene I posted last week which is where this conversation actually started. Tony has already been crying and this was just the icing on the cake. However, on Friday's post, I actually did make Tony ask what happened to the baby so his crying does make more sense.

Meghan Ward said...

Sorry, this is off topic, but I'm new to this blog and I'm dying to know - where ARE you? Piedmont, Italy? I live near a town called Piedmont, so at first I thought you were there, but it has no foothills that I know of.