After writing yesterday's post, I re-read it about 700 times and thought about changing it, then I said, no, I'd let you all see just how crazy I really am. I mean, what should really be a simple idea -- just write the damn novel already -- leaves me with pains in my stomach, a massive headache and really no idea of how I'm going to structure this thing. If I "just write" it, I have a story, nothing more. If I structure it, I have building tension and climaxes. If I structure it correctly, I have a story with fantastic building tension, climaxes, a final heart wrenching ending and an agent screaming "Send this to me at once."
Fitzgerald wrote and re-wrote "Gatsby" (I think) 6 times before he let the publisher do his thing. While it was at the publisher's. I wouldn't do that to a publisher but I want to be like F. Scott. I want the damn thing to be PERFECT!!!!
Okay, I won't keep you, here's more of REMEMBERING YOU. And please note this will only be up for 2 days.
******* Disclaimer -- yes there is swearing in this but not as much. I've toned down Genna's potty mouth. Also, there are two or three small bits that I took out because it was on the longish side, and even without it, it is rather long. Sorry. I just wanted you to have the full effect.
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Sorry this post has been removed by the author.
27 comments:
lol. A book with girls in the potty room. Too funny. Okay, that's probably not the feedback you'd prefer, but that's all my brain keeps saying. THEY GO POTTY!
Well, keep us posted on what structure you decide to go with. I'm sure you'll think of something brilliant to do.
I LOVE Fitzgerald! *sigh*
Great writing! You have my interest!
Um, Blogger is telling me my comment was published before I even typed anything. Just me, or has it been really buggy lately? Anyway, great post, Anne! I'm looking forward to more Genna & Tony snippits in the future.
Christi -- Well, hey, a girl's gotta pee you know.
Dominique -- I think as everyone yesterday said to just shut up and write it, I will. So the structure probably won't emerge until after I'm done.
Crystal -- I know, F. Scott is one of my faves. Thanks.
Summer -- It's not you, Blogger has mice I think. Thanks.
Blogger has been buggy the last few days.
Great dialog, Anne.
I wanted Tony to show up though.
Great scene! I see it playing like a movie in my mind and that is always a good thing, in my opinion. Looking forward to seeing more of it. :o)
have you looked at the snowflake method? I know nicole did a post on it the other day, and i LOVE the first 6 steps or so. If not, it might help you with your structure problem. Otherwise, manuscript makeover has a good chapter on structures
See, this is just what you should be doing: put the characters together and make sure there's plenty of friction and discomfort! Keep the tension high!
Word of advice: "semi-handsome" and "beautiful" are vague terms; you should be as specific as you can, like you were with the garden in the last scene you shared. I'd introduce the characters (Pauly and that bitch he married) and *then* tell how they're both different from when they were young. Slim, perfect teeth, etc. But you can do that when you revise. For now, just plow forward through the story.
Your dialogue is fresh and authentic in this scene. I like that the characters move around, to the jukebox, to the ladies room. This keeps my mind's eye on the action and my attention engaged with the characters.
I feel your "structure" pain, but I agree with you: keep your fingers moving, let the story out, and the whole thing will gel by the end (or rather, you'll know how to mold it into shape once you know how it all turns out). LOL at myself -- if only I could take my OWN advice!!
I'm glad you didn't allow yourself to edit yourself. Sometimes you just need to get it out. :)
Okay, I have been lurking around for awhile but I have to say I think you are an amazing writer. You have a real knack for description and characterization. Keep at it and I am sure you will find yourself in print someday.
Wonderful post and a great excerpt! You are such a talented writer - keep it up, don't get discouraged!
great excerpt! I enjoyed reading. Keep it up! :)
Lola -- He does show up, right after where I cut the scene. You really didn't think I was going to let you in on THAT did you??? Only kidding, that's next week. The scene between him and Genna isn't finished yet so I didn't know what to put in.
E.Elle -- That's funny you should mention movie because that's exactly how I'm writing it, just like I'd see it on the big screen. *hope* *hope*
Sarah A -- I've seen what Nicole's been doing but haven't really looked at anything yet. I'm hoping to really get a grip on it next week when Monster Baby's out of school.
Scott -- Funny how you say that this is what I'm supposed to be doing, keeping the tension high with friction. I thought I was just writing a story. I hear you with the show not tell, ie. beautiful - semi handsome. Thanks for pointing that out.
Anne, I think it's fine that you're being crazy about the book. I've rewritten Monarch once now, and I've done about 5 revisions. Davin has worked on Rooster for 6 years. These things take time - and a lot of craziness!
Nicole -- You don't think it's too much moving around? You don't think it's kind of boring...she moved to the juke, she moved to the dance floor, she went to the ladies.
Sarah said for me to try the snowflake method and see where that takes me with the structure. So, I'm going to see if I can get my hands on the book while M.B. is out of school next week.
Elana -- No editing for this go-round, this is fresh print baby, straight off of Word. I try not to edit until I'm really finished.
Emily J. -- Well thanks for lurking. And thanks for the lovely compliments. Feel free to stop by anytime.
B. Miller -- Thank you very much. I'm sorry you weren't here for the beginning of the story though. It would have made so much more sense to you.
Kristi -- Hey, nice to see you around! How's the new job? Thanks for the compliment.
Glam -- Well, we already know that I'm crazy but I also don't have a lot of time so I have to get it out and be done with revisions by the end of the summer.
I really like this a lot. It just gets better and better. I liked a lot of the lines you have here and the dialogue is really sharp. :)
Sarah Jayne -- Thanks, not too 'girly'?
You wrote the jealous bathroom scene so well - I could have been there.
#don't you find you just have to go for things - post and hope? My experience has shown that people who are working on their own writing are supportive and helpful.
Elaine -- Thanks. I wasn't sure if the bathroom would work here but I guess it turned out all right. Yeah, you said it, post and hope. I try to be supportive and helpful, it's the only way to pay it forward.
This is terrific, Anne! I agree with the others, the dialogue is very real and very fun to read.
Oh, well done!
I like the way the scene unfolds. Although it's heavy on dialogue, it's not static so it feels natural. As for the moving around, in real life people stand/sit in one place for hours and talk. On the page this usually translates to a bloody bore - I give you 99% of all restaurant scenes. In a group scene like this, you want to keep your characters moving. This feels vibrant, alive.
Even though this is the first excerpt I've read, I'm already getting a clear sense of the characters. Excellent. But I agree with Scott about avoiding the vague descriptives. Adjectives should work to set a particular character or setting apart from all other characters and settings. If the descriptive doesn't do that, you don't need it.
I'm an abysmal failure at structure and should not be commenting, but I think it's always best to get the story down first. It's easier to impose structure on an amorphous story then it is to fit a story into a set-in-stone structure.
Shelley -- Thanks. Glad you could get to see this.
VR -- Yeah, about the vague descriptives... I should have made a note at the top this is still all first draft, I'm just trying to get it out, not really working on the revisions yet. But I'm glad you liked it. I'm glad you got to see a little bit of the story. (I've been posting excerpts of this story as I write them for the last 6 weeks or so.)
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