I sat on the computer for 14 straight hours Saturday. Yep, you heard me, 14 freakin' hours. 7:30am - 9:30pm. I was on a roll. The word count went from 80,0823Fri. night to 85,946 Sat. night. (And yes, I did take breaks to feed and water the Monster Child. She wasn't feeling all that swell so she mostly laid around upstairs in bed.)
I was almost finished. All. Most. Finished. Probably 3000 more words. Maybe 3, possibly 4 more scenes. But, I stopped. Well, yeah, I was like wicked tired, but still wired, you know. I re-set my clock and went to bed.
I took a break on Sunday. I cleaned the house. I did some laundry. I gave away three years worth of Monster Child's clothes to a man who lost his wife and well, you know how that goes. I raked some leaves, I picked up a bunch of downed limbs. My mother came over with the dog and we dissed my sister-in-law again. Never touched the computer. Didn't even look at it.
At 1am Monday morning, Monster Child woke me up out of sound sleep crying because she couldn't breathe. (Stuffy nose. Oh yes, spring has sprung. Thanks tree pollen.)
I gave her medicine, waited until she could breathe again and lay there in the dark until 5 freaking 30, thinking about my story.
Everything that I wrote on Saturday, isn't going to work. Yeah, it's pretty good if I do say so myself, really full of tension - angst - anxiety. Poor Ellis. Poor Violet. But I have to go even further back than that. I would say the last 20,000 words aren't going to work.
I've lost the original premise of the story somewhere along the way. I mean, it's sort of there, but Lady Olivia is really playing much too much a role. It's convoluted, murky, muddied up with too much pop and wow. I was trying to make every page, every scene zing. I was listening to what I've read, you need to have tension on every page. Yeah, you know what, no, you really don't.
This story is not an action/adventure/suspense/thriller, it's a love story. A basic simple love story. Yes, there's tension, angst, and anxiety, people get hurt, lies are told, hearts are broken. If you only knew what I put poor Ellis and Violet through. Sorry, I can't tell you that.
So, I probably won't be around for the rest of the week. I really want to finish this and I was sooooo close. God, that's frustrating. I've got to go back in and find where I took that first wrong turn.
Question -- Have you ever done this? I mean, found where you went wrong right before you finished? Revisions are one thing and totally a whole beast unto themselves - but have you ever gotten almost to the end and realized you screwed up?